Shame is a powerful emotion that has the potential to shape peoples’ lives in significant ways.

The Merriam Webster Dictionary defines shame as “a condition of humiliating disgrace or disrepute.”

People who experience shame feel worthless, embarrassed, humiliated, and unclean.

Have you ever thought about shame? Where does it come from ? Why does it have such an effect on us? Why do we worry about what people think?

Nee my kind jy kan nie dit doen nie, wat sal die mense sê?

We value so much what people think about us that we end up giving them our remote for our lives, we give them the right to control us.

I coach various girls and ladies softball teams and I was fascinated by the players experiencing shame or feeling they’re letting down the team.

Nothing wrong about trying to do your best, problem comes in when you feel you’ve done something wrong and you’re letting down the team, if you let it go and carry on, no problem…

The majority of the players listen to their inner coach shouting at them “how could you miss that catch, or great going fruitloop you missed the ground ball and could have made an easy out, now they scored a run, shame on you, look everyone is looking at you, what would your mother say?” shame on you, the player is out of the game, second guessing herself and missing easy plays because she is so focused on not dropping the team or doing something wrong.

The subconscious mind is such a powerful thing but battles with negative messages, for example if I say DON’T think about a little pink pig dressed in a ballet tutu dress, flying, what are you thinking about? a little pink pig, right?

So if my inner coach keep on shouting don’t mess up, don’t drop the ball, guess what, that is exactly what you’re going to do!

Imagine how your life would change if you remove the emotions of feeling ashamed from your life!

Is it possible to do?

Let me know what you think, I will share in a follow up post how it can be done.